Fictionary is a column showcasing beauty- and fitness-related words that don’t exist, but should.


Regular readers know I’m quite committed to my thrice-weekly (oh yeah, I busted out a Rose Nyland-style “thrice up in here”) Core Fusion classes at Exhale Spa. However, I’m not quite as committed to the $13– pair Exhale grippy socks, which are so very necessary for plank positions. Since I’m always Exhale-ing, I needed to invest in a few pairs of the socks and after buying two, I decided to find some that do the job, even if not emblazoned with the totally-more-bougie “Exhale.” Read on… 
I searched for some proletariat ones online and am quite pleased with this three-pack of Counterfeet ones (or “mocks,” if you prefer) at a fraction of the price. From far away, they look like your standard-issue Exhale version, but once close up, you realize they say… Crescent Moon. It’s like when you buy generic Spaghetti-Os.


Besides getting called out once in a while by instructors whom I’m chummier with like my gals Devon, Adrienne and Jessica, more often than not, my Counterfeet go undetected. And I emerge the victor with flatter abs AND a fatter wallet. 


Crescent Moon non-slip exersocks retail for $25 for pack of three at amazon. So nice, and you’ll get new socks THRICE.