Fictionary is a column showcasing beauty-related words that don’t exist, but should.

I don’t have a recent photo of exactly what Nail Fail Resulting from a Cocktail looks like, and I’m glad about it.

Nail Fail Resulting from a Cocktail happens when, after an evening of drinks, vertical lines marble through my fresh polish application most unwelcomed. It’s most visible on pale pink polish–usually when I’ve invested in a professional mani with Essie Sugar Daddy with the “genius” idea that a light pink polish will boast more bang for the buck, as chips are more discreet. But Nail Fail Resulting from a Cocktail renders my careful planning moot (or “moo,” as Joey Tribbiani once said) because SOMEHOW the vertical “cracks” in my nails are much darker than simple chips. They’re most akin to the grey lines within an Etch-a-Sketch.

It’s sinisterly magical–I’ve never experienced the immediacy of this type of marred mani from anything other than a night of alcoholic indulgence. This is why when I know a wedding or other such booze-soaked affair is coming up, I invest in a “shot” of Shellac.

Have you experienced Nail Fail Resulting from a Cocktail?

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