“Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.”–Red in The Shawshank Redemption, possibly the most satisfying movie ever made. The movie boasted a kind of bromance theme (amongst many others, obv). And yet, it was made pre- the age of man-dates and bromances. Discuss.

So, let’s be real with each other, dolls. There are times when hope ISN’T enough. Like, when you want to prolong your self-tan. That’s when I find Hope is Not Enough Omega 3-6-9 Replenishing Body Lotion ($35) to be worth its weight in gold. Curiously (though not intolerably) vitamin-scented, its easily-absorbed consistency yields a dream hydrating machine. It’s my favorite loshe consistency I’ve found in my lifestyle thus far. Holy grail. I rock it ALL the time. It’s my number 1 in my rotation. AND I can’t remember liking a body moisturizer THIS MUCH. In fact, it’s kind of criminal that it’s taken me this long to tell you about it, beauties, and for that, I profusely APOLOGIZE.

Best of all? Every time I read the product’s name, I think: 3,6,9 damn you’re fine move it so you can sock it to me one mo time.

That’s a quote from the selected works of Lil’ Jon & The East Side Boyz.